You never really forget
by Ovensfriends
Summary: The mind is not a toy. You can't hit the 'reset' button time and again, then expect everything to turn out okay.
1. Default Chapter

Disclaimer: I am claiming that these characters, the setting, and the base for which I write my story, are not mine. But belong to the God that is Eoin Colfer. Once again, I weep.

A/N: Please, forgive me for my details of the setting. I only know what's written in the book. So please... don't spear me.

"Stupid..." she shoved her self into a pod "idiotic..." she shoved a rubber cylinder into her mouth "of all the" she managed to spit out as she toggled herself off the platform "d'arvit."

Plummeting into the fire painted abyss was always the thrill that Holly Short needed to cool down, as ironic as it was.

She relaxed into the seat, the jelly mass embracing her. Her jaw slackened its hold on the cylinder. Her eyes closed as the pod continued its free fall to the center of the Earth.

Lost in the moment, she let her mind wander.

Really not a good thing to do at that time.

Especially if it meant she wasn't worrying about the flare that just might not be coming and the recon job she'd have if it did.

All such thoughts were gone. Her mind meandered back through time. She didn't know how long she had been falling, but her drifting thoughts hit something much like a brick wall.

Holly even thought she heard a _thunk_.

Jerked back into reality by rumbling and another real, _thunk_, Holly bit down on the cylinder and gripped the toggles of the little pod.

Funding wasn't so great, so she- their top recon officer and only _female_ officer- was stuck riding a literal egg with brain fluid on the head rest.

Wires nearly in the way of the dials, pod shaking like a little sprite in the presence of Commander Root him self, Holly never felt more alive.

She flexed her fingers and waited impatiently for the tide of magma and torrents of fire to cease so that she could propel her self onto the landing dock.

**LEP head quarters**

"Are you sure that was a good idea, Foaly?" Root chewed mirthlessly on another fungus cigar. He was never broken of the habit.

"Sending her out?" blinked the centaur. "Well, it _is_ her job, you know."

"This is how it happened last time. And..." he trailed off, squinting at something that wasn't there.

Foaly regarded him for a moment, and began to understand.

"Julius, she'll be fine. The mind wipe was made a long time ago," At this Root turned his attention back to the horse man hybrid. "Fowls, Butlers," Root's brow knotted together in the center of his forehead as Foaly spoke, "and Holly's."

**Maynooth, Ireland**

Holly had escaped out of the fire hell grinning like a fool. She flexed her fingers again before slapping the release button on her seat restraints.

Her fowl mood returned when she remembered the task at hand.

Grimacing, she returned to her string of insults and curses.

"Can't even keep an eye on a _troll_, for the love of the gods." She muttered as she shouldered a set of wings.

"Nearly got a holiday," double checked her weaponry, "then this stint was pulled," checked all the dials and switches on the wings, "I'm going to kill that centaur."

She stalked from the sizzeling pod to the sealed door. Muttering under her breath, she punched- literally punched. Foaly complained later on that the keys nearly broke- in the code and the door hissed open.

Inhaling deeply, Holly calmed again.

Turning on the wings, she set her shield, made sure the door was closed and shielded, and flew high into the night air.

**Fowl Manor**

"Sunglasses, master?" Butler inquired.

"Yes, Butler. Sunglasses." Artemis smiled his vampire smile, all the while, underneath his cold demeanor, his chest tightened and he felt a pang of déjà vu sweep over him.

'Nonsense, Artemis,' He told himself as he set about his preparations, 'None of this has happened before.'

Though his reassurances didn't convince as well as he pretended it did, for a little voice in the back of his head spoke up briefly

'Yes it has...'


	2. Chapter Two

Disclaimer: I have already stated that He Who Shall Be Worshiped... ForHisWritingAbilities is the one true creator and master of the characters of which I am about to 'borrow' and use for my own Horrid purposes.

A/N: wow... I didn't think that I'd get any reviews at all, save for flames telling me that my writing is horrid and that I should give up now. Thank you ever so much for reviewing.

Dorinda: Something like that. We'll see, now won't we? [insert smiley here]

Jouichirou: Thank you for reviewing. Hope you enjoy the next chapter.

Ahava: Many many many many many many many many many many many thanks! And every one who clicks on this, read Ahava's story that's oh so pretty. If she would up date. :cough:

FlyingPurplePig: :bows: Thank you for reviewing. (I [insert heart here] your pen name.)

Marfbag: It's not set in the first book. I didn't really want to put that in the summary, but write it in. :P

cocoaducks: a) Thank you for reviewing. b) About your pen name... ducky ducks duck duck duckduck duckies go squeak like the rubber ducks duckduck. (I just had to get that out.)

FairyHunter: Wow. Thank you. I think. I'm not quiet sure what you mean about the "plot develops into something like the rest of the pathetic sludge on " but... I hope that I am not too great of a disappointment to you. Thank you for reviewing.

Once again a great many thanks to all that reviewed. Deeply sorry that the first chapter was "too short", but my brain doesn't work. I just doesn't.

Here you go. Enjoy. And please review. Amazingly, it is motivation to keep writing.

**Maynooth, Ireland**

Poised in the sky on the out skirts of Maynooth- fully shielded of course- Holly admired the sky of which she and her People have been deprived of. She flew in lazy circles around the hills. A smile tingeing her lips once more, she let out an involuntary sigh as a shooting star made its way across the velvet of the night.

A voice that sounded so real, it could have been in the helmet with her, crackled in her ear.

"Holly, you know that you have somewhat of a _job_ to do, right? It's not like you're getting paid for admiring the view." Foaly, as sarcastic and annoying as ever, threw her once again into the wonderful reality that Holly didn't quite want to exist in.

Mumbling something about making the horse eat his own aluminum helmet, Holly toggled her way towards the little bleeping red light on her locator.

**Fowl Manor **

Artemis Fowl the Second sat in his favorite chair in his room, eye brows etched together in concentration. A small thought had been nagging him from the back of his mind for quite a while. It was diminutive, barely a whisper. Yet it made it self known.

He felt twinges of guilt as he worked out his plot.

Torrid waves of déjà vu as he studied the Fairy Book.

He had dreams that could possibly be memories, but never could have happened.

The ease at which he created his master plan. It was as if he knew their reactions already, as if he knew the exact words that would escape the People's lips as he attempted to derive them of their gold. Ease that was only marred by the turmoil that rolled by and twisted his stomach in a feeling that he disliked almost as much as he disliked being wrong.

Guilt did not agree with Artemis. It did not become him.

And slowly it was consuming him.

Juliet came in at about six holding a tray with chicken Fricassee and leek soup.

"Hey there, Arty." She set the tray down on his table and set up his dinner. "Oh, there's also some Crepes with cider being made in the kitchen," she turned her gaze from the food to Artemis and smiled, "just incase you wanted a little something later as well." She noticed the look on his face before his cold mask was set. Her own smile faltered and she kneeled beside him. "Arty," she reached a slim hand up to his face in a sisterly fashion, "what's the matter?"

He tried to slip back into the cold, unfeeling demeanor that he usually was in, but as he fingers reached his cheek, it melted away, and he expressed his worry to her.

"This is just all... so..." he frowned again, trying to figure out the words he needed.

"Familiar."

Juliet and Artemis looked up to see Butler leaning against the door frame. His face was set in a thoughtful frown.

"I know what you mean, Artemis. I feel it as well, as clichéd as that sounds." He walked into the room and stood behind his younger sister.

"Thank you, Domovoi." Artemis said absently. His thoughts where still clouded and more confusing now that he knew the others felt the same.

He didn't notice the odd silence that grew between Butler and Juliet.

After a while, Juliet spoke up.

"Arty, what did you call Butler?"

He was brought out of his reverie by the concern in her tone and when met both of the Butler's gazes, he frowned in confusion.

"Butler. I called him Butler like I always do."

Brother and sister stole a glance at each other.

"What is it?" Artemis inquired.

"Nothing, Master." Butler reassured him and walked out of the room to the kitchens again.

Juliet stood and left him as well, throwing a smile over her shoulder.

Artemis was left alone to ponder what just happened, and what may have happened before.

**Maynooth, Ireland **

Glancing at her locator, the troll should be within half a mile of her.

"Odd..." she muttered to her self.

"What?" Foaly's voice asked.

Holly rolled her eyes. 'No privacy. Stupid horse. Asking his stupid one word questions, thinking someone will understand him, then sneering down on us all.' She thought to her self.

"I said 'Odd'." Holly answered out loud.

"I know." Said the impatient centaur, "I was asking you what was odd."

'You know,' Holly thought to her self again, 'if he didn't always speak to people like he was speaking to a child, maybe he wouldn't have to hide in that damned booth from all the people that want to kill him.'

Holly sighed audibly and answered the question to the best of her abilities.

"There's no damage. No troll."

Simplicity is key, she was once told.

She expected something smart assed from the other end of the line, but all she got was silence.

"Foaly?"

**LEP Headquarters – Ops booth**

"Hold on." He responded.

Foaly clicked around on two of his key boards, finding that, indeed, there was no troll. Nothing.

Scowling at the screen, he turned back to Holly, but didn't speak for a while.

He heard a chuckle on the other end of the line, and Holly's voice asking,

"Are you finally stumped, Foaly?"

His scowl deepened and he bit his lip before answering.

"Yes."

Foaly could practically hear the thoughts in her mind as if they were scrolling across the screen in a marquee.

'Well... this is new.'

And indeed, those were her exact words.

"Well... this is new."

He grimaced at the fact that it wasn't new at all. He had been wrong many a time, but those times are the ones that Holly asked to forget.

**Fowl Manor**

"Well Butler," Artemis strolled in to the kitchen after he finished his meal. It seemed that he had walked in on a brother sister moment, but the two looked on at Artemis and waited for him to continue.

Raising an eye brow delicately, he did.

"Shall we carry out the plan?"

A/N: Thank you for reading. I hope you enjoyed it. And if you have any thoughts at all, please review. Have a nice day.


	3. Chapter Three

Disclaimer: I am getting tired of repeatedly telling you all that I AM NOT EOIN COLFER AND I DO NOT OWN HIS CHARICTERS IN ANYWAY SHAPE OR FORM, because it just makes me oh so sad. insert sad face here

So so so so so so sorry for the delay! School has been a mean old ferret that should be taken out and shot.

cocoaducks: Thank you for reviewing again. I'm sorry about the story idea. :P (I still love your pen name.)

Holly Rox: ... You're expecting a lot out of me... oh my...

mad sam: Hahaha, I think that your pen name warns us in advance of... yes. Hahaha. Your review makes me smile, and that makes my day all "sharp and pointy, just like I like it." Thank you for reviewing!

Marfbag: Oh... sorry for the misunderstanding. Glad to see you're still reading though. It makes me happy.

sugaCraZie: :yelps: Very well..?!

Dorinda: Dear, speaking from experience, eating things that are not for eating but then deciding to eat them anywhatwho isn't really good for you. Thank you for the reviews!

Naoko Misumi: Thank you ever so much for reviewing. It would make me happier if I knew what you wrote... heh...

Ahava: :squeal: ... :cough: Thank you for reviewing again! Forgive me for my ignorance, but I'm 'new' to , and... the world in general- but we won't discuss that now- what's a beta?

AgiVega: I was thinking about making it a romance, and I put it in the story description... thing. But I am now rethinking that. I'm not sure how I would want that to go. :sigh: I'll just let the story lead me! Thank you for reviewing!

Jouichirou: Thank you, very, _very_ much! I don't really think that anyone has told me my writing is brilliant, and it means much.

Another big thanks to all those that have reviewed! Please, do it again, and you'll get... three more units of my respect! And gods know that there's little enough of that floating around.

Try to enjoy the next chapter!

**LEP Headquarters**

Foaly fumed and look on his face as he concentrated resembled that of Root as he tried to understand that horse's jargon.

"Foaly?" Holly's voice rang through the intercom, worry in her tone.

The centaur's mind raced as he tried to figure out how this could have happened.

Somewhere in the back of his mind, he panicked. Just in this recluse corner, mind you.

"Hold on, Holls." And with the he dashed off to have a very calm chat with Commander Root.

"JULIUS!" Foaly called out in a very un-male like manner as his hooves slipped as he scrambled through LEP Headquarters. He skidded to a halt out side of Root's door, and threw it open. His breathing was ragged, foil hat askew, legs (all four) splayed and had his hands up against a wall to balance him self. Take a few deep breaths and counting to ten, he regained his composure, adjusted his foil hat, and clipped softly into the room.

Clasping his hands together he said delicately and in a genteel manner, "There was no troll."

There was an Odd moment when it seemed as if sound were not real. A storm could have blown in and the Commander would not have slackened his jaw's clamp on the cigar or loosened his grip on his chair.

In that moment, Foaly's hairy hands strategically placed them selves at his ear.

"Okay. So there is not troll." Root spoke up quietly. "Is there a reason that we have," Root closed his eyes, inhaled deeply "A WHOLE RETRIVAL TEAM SET UP READY TO GO?!" his face turned purple, and Foaly was sure that this time he would explode.

Foaly stayed silent while Root over heated and thought about the possibilities.

'No,' he told him self. 'it can't be. My mind wipes are perfect... this time.' And with that reassurance, he let no further thoughts wander to that as a possibility.

Root was still seething in anger behind his desk. After a while, the realization seemed to hit him, and his jaw slackened and the red-almost-purple complexion of his face drained a little.

"It's not-"

"No." Foaly stated simply.

Obviously willing to believe any weak hypothesis instead of thinking that the boy had found them again, that they would have to go through the same ordeal again, Root agreed with the glitch.

As if to reassure him self further, he clicked onto Holly's line.

"Short? You copy?"

"Yessir."

"There's no troll."

"...yes sir."

"Get your behind back here, but," here he paused for breath, and Foaly's brow knit together trying to understand that the Commander was planning, "take a trip, and perform the ritual. Over and out, Short."

"Julius?" Foaly took a tentive step towards the wooden desk which Root was situated behind.

"I needed to, Foaly." The cigar was our from between his teeth and forgotten in an ash tray. His lips were set in a thin line and his amber eyes fixed on some non existent form once again. "I had to..."

"Why?" asked Foaly. He barely uttered his one worded question before the answer came known to him by his own reasoning. He straightened his back and blinked and mouthed, "Oh." But Root didn't notice as his smoldering gaze was still frying something that only he could see.

There was a moment of silence which Foaly took as his dismissal, yet his commanding officer spoke.

"It'll be that last bit of closure."

Foaly was at the threshold of the door when Root's voice demanded his attention once again. Without turning, he paused and put one hairy hand on the door frame. Root continued.

"The mind wipes were successful, but each time, this is how it all happened. SO far, there has been no recall. We've never had it this good so far into the game the last times. So this will be my last bit of closure, the last time I have to worry about Fowl, or Holly, or anyone else's, " Root then whispered softly, "the last time..."

He lifted his eyes to Foaly's back and slightly turned head. The horse's eyes were softer than usual and Root realized that he had confided in the subordinate once again. Regaining his poise, he cleared his throat and threw papers about his desk and mumbled something along the lines of, "Besides, the she elf will be fine."

Foaly walked clipped out of the room smiling softly at Root's display of actual emotion and concern. His smile faded when he remembered what he read during each of Holly's mind wipes.

Root flipped his lid when he read that.

It happened the same way each time.

It all started the same way, the same event triggered it. Foaly didn't understand how.

Every time.

He locked himself in the Ops booth, and pulled up that same file that had him befuddled time after time.

Each mind wipe, he read the same thing. Each daily routine that he witnessed was the same as the last.

**Maynooth, Ireland**

"Short? You copy?"

'_Finally_', thought Holly still hovering over the large rock and tree. "Yes sir." She spoke into her helmet, the button of a button of a microphone picking up her voice easily.

"There's no troll."

Holly's thoughts stopped at that point. 'There's no hope for the LEP or the Lower Elements at all if the LEP are the top of the top.' It took her a while to find her voice again.

"...yes sir."

He then told her to perform the ritual, and clicked off before she could respond.

Befuddled by the commanders seemingly rash decision Holly rose to 300 feet and glided softly in the night wondering how he could have known that she needed to perform the ritual in the first place.

Holly flew in lazy circles and found her self in Claine. The river that bent on the out skirts of the little town sparkled, the little ripples and waves made by the gentle current waved at her, greeted her.

She landed down softly under the leaves of an oak tree. Her hands released the toggles and reached up to remove her helmet. For an instant, she hesitated and that feeling of déjà vu washed over her as the river did over the rocks. Ignoring it like she had done before, she removed the helmet and unclipped the wings from her back.

She stretched out her arms and breathed in the night air. Looking up, she could see the light from the moon struggling to go between the green leaves. Smiling widely to see the stars, moon, and flowing water again, she touched a hand to the rough of bark of the tree. When her fingers met the wood, there was a slight whistle of wind and she felt a numbing pain in her lower back. Behind her, she heard a cracking of a twig under foot. Under a heavy and very large foot she soon realized as he gaze fell upon a mammoth of a man. Behind him, a younger form stepped out from the bushes.

A wave of drowsiness crashed upon her mind and body. Her eye lids dropped and her limbs failed to support her weight. Before she fell completely unconscious to the ground, she heard the taller one speak to the smaller framed human.

"You were right, Artemis."

The name resounded in her mind, even as it was shrouded in darkness.

Sorry for the delay. Hope you liked this one. Review!!!


	4. Chapter Four

Disclaimer: The characters don't belong to me, the setting does not belong to me. Like I've read before, if I were Eion Colfer, why in the name of all that is Evil and Sinful would I be writing here?

Dorinda: I'm glad that you're not eating... glass anymore. ;; Thank you for reviewing.

marfbag: Thank you for reading!

gunther: That part was fun to write! I get overly excited when I write, just as much as when I read. So the People that I live with think I'm insane. Thank you for the review!

Naoko Misumi: Oh! Well I thank thee very much for reading! And for reviewing!

kiesh: Sorry that is wasn't exactly soon... but here's an update!

Sweet-straw hat: Foaly reminds me of one of my friends, who is overly intelligent, at times arrogant about it, and acts like a complete idiot. Thank you for the review!

No spearing, please. Yes, it's been long. But... HOMEWORK AND LARGE PROJECTS AND EXAMS AND ESSAYS SHOULD BE TAKEN OUT AND SHOT! THEN THE CARCASS SHOULD BE TRAMPLED ON MY EMUS AND GAZELLS! -weeps-

Okay.

Wheee! Chapter four!

_'Help... me...'_

_The plea came from deep within herself. A part of her that beat upon that sealed door in her mind. A part of her that knew beyond the blockade was a torrent of memories, emotions. Another little voice spoke, and that little voice said that things forgotten are better left in the dark._

_Yet she let herself try and pry open the door, screaming in frustration, leaving herself disheveled, breathing racked with sobs._

_So near to human, so fragile..._

_She remembered those words._

_So broken._

_Her eyes clenched shut against the blinding glare of the small lamp in the corner of her room._

_Too bright._

_She let her eye lids open slightly, letting in a slit of light. She winced as her pupils dilated; a black hole engulfing the light. She recoiled, almost shutting her eyes again, but she was determined to be rid of the offending light._

_She reached out into it, the sickly yellow glow. It was nothing like the light of the sun r the eureathral blue breath of the moon. It was fake, false._

_Too bright, she growled._

_Her fingers grazed the smooth, green porcelain of the lamp. The color reminded her of moss. A chain reaction; she was then reminded of trees, and the night, and a river. The river that gurgled, and rushed by with hushed voices._

_A voice..._

_She was lost in her thoughts, and was unable to recall the proper way to turn off the light, she pushed the side of the lamp with one slim, emaciated finger. The lamp rocked a little, sending light into previously dark corners. She slightly closed one eye, hating the light for its existence, hating it for it shone into every crevice but the one that was sealed off in her mind. She pushed again, tipping the lamp over. It fell off the table, and landed bulb first onto her hard wood floor._

_Its fall ended in a loud crash, the sound echoed in the empty room, the empty house, and in her havocked mind._

_The sound made her open her eyes completely and she sat up on her bed._

_Her dark, auburn hair spilled around her shoulders, as she had let it grow out over the years. Her hair also fell about her face like a bloody veil. The tee shirt hung loosely on her shoulders, surrounding the pale skin of her neck in dark blue. Her skin was made pale by torment, such a short time, but grievance eats away at flesh and well being quickly. Her left collar bone was exposed as well. The gentle curve of her breasts heaved in time with her ragged breathes. Her leg splayed, tangled in the sheets. Arms, loosely hung at her side like the puppeteer had cut the strings, though one hand of its on violation fisted the light blue sheets tightly._

_Brown eyes ringed with green fell upon green shards._

_Her legs hefted her up from the bed, and carried her to the broken lamp._

_She scoffed, "Like a fallen angel then," she muttered mirthlessly, "once gave light; now broken and shattered at the devil's feet."_

_Reaching down, she took a large shard in her hand._

_Standing erect again, she admired the sharp tip of the broken porcelain._

_Opening her hand, palm up, she positioned the shard so that the tip ran half way up her the crook of her arm. Her fingers closed on the flatter side of the shard, it being triangular, and she held it at arms' length, directly in front of her chest._

_Holly pounded on the metal door one last time and drove the shard into herself._

_As the blood soaked her shirt and crept up it, as her life rushed from the large wound, the door opened and memories flooded her._

**Fowl Manor**

Holly sat up in the cot, her hair wet with sweat and matted against her scalp.

Her breathing was hurried, as if she has just run, and it felt as if she had. As if she had just rushed from the past-a horrible past- to this future.

She screamed out, frustration wrapping its cold fingers around her again. Anger creeping up her spine with its hot flames.

She almost remembered.

Almost.

But that dream couldn't have been a memory... could it?

Her arms were sore, and there was cotton in the crook of her right arm, but she numbly undid the zipper and buttons on her jump suit. Getting that off her shoulders, she pulled down the neck of her undershirt to reveal a gleaming white scar.

Fingering it lightly, her breath slowed but her mind raced.

How? She remembered getting that wound during recon training. Stupid safety trigger wasn't on. Dumber jock out to make something of him self tinkering around with it. She had taken it in the chest, and her magic hadn't healed her quickly enough to leave her with out mar.

Her red locks hung about her face as her eyes stared down at the newly cemented floor. Her fingers still traced the scar. Holly was so lost in thoughts of how close she was to remembering, so close to breaking down that previously found brick wall, she didn't notice when the door opened and a lithe frame slithered in.

"Capitan Short..."

Brought out of her revere, Holly cast her gaze up towards the figure.

Her hazel eyes widened when she saw who it was. She still held her shirt down with a finger on the scar, now right where the healed flesh was, she felt a horrible pang. It ripped through her, eliciting a raspy moan.

The boy- no, the young man had moved further into the room and closer to the ct, though seemed unperturbed that his captive was suffering.

Holly swung her legs over the cot, remembering her ... dream. Coughing up some bile, she spat on the ground. Wiping her lips with the back of her right hand, left clutching the sheets on the cot, she glared at the black haired human, Mud Man before her. She frowned further when she saw the sun glasses.

'Blue eyes'

Widening her eyes again, Holly felt a larger surge of pain from her chest, and her head felt like it was splitting apart.

'Those eyes are blue.'

Something in the back of her mind rang. A bell.

The alarm had gone off.

**LEP Headquarters, Ops Booth**

Foaly paced back and forth in the booth. Muttering again and again. "Not good not good."

Holly had not come back yet, and it had been a few hours.

Not a few. It had been many hours. Too long.

A little red light biped on in intercom.

Pushing a button blindly, Foaly hoarsely spat out, "Who is it and what do you want?"

"...Foaly?"

Realizing it was the commander, hopefully telling him that Holly was back, hopefully tell him that he could stop making that racket in the booth, Foaly leaned over the intercom, eyes wide ears pricked up, listening intently.

There was no sound for the longest time. It felt like forever. Time was almost as slow moving as it was when he waited for Holly to come out of Fowl Manor, not expecting a large sum of money to float out with her. After a few more quick breaths, the horse got fed up. He hollered into the speaker, "Julius! What is it?!"

The response came back crackly. Possibly because the commander had ripped his intercom off the wall and threw it violently into the ground.

Foaly hoped that he didn't hear it correctly. He hoped against hope that the worst possible thing to happen didn't just occur.

"Julius! Repeat it! I repeat; REPEAT!!!"

"She was taken."

Root didn't even have to say who. He didn't have to say anymore than that. With those three words, Foaly knew that the world would come crashing down again.

This time, it would be not mediocre ending.

This time, it would be an ending.

Thank you for reading. I hope that this chapter was good-ish. Review! It makes me happy! :D


	5. Chapter Five

**Fowl Manor**

Artemis leaned against his door. His hands covered his face, and a sigh slipped through his parted lips.

He hadn't expected this. He had expected her to be upset, he was prepared for her to think of him as evil beyond words because… because that's what the feelings of déjà vu, the feelings of remorse kicked in the most.

But she had seen him, and threw her self around, screaming bloody murder.

There were two things about this.

First, it didn't feel familiar, it was something unexpected.

That was good.

The second reason- he worried. Not for her health, not for her sanity, but he worried that he may have damaged goods to barter with.

He let him self wonder if the People would risk exposure over something that would more likely kill it self in a matter of days. Then again, a body is evidence.

Sighing again, he sat down before his desk, trying to revise his plan.

"_I'm going insane," she muttered as she threw her self at the wall again, "fucking insane."_

_As a scream was torn raggedly from her throat, the wall came into intimate contact with her fist. _

_Knuckles throbbing, she beat her head against the door after every repetition of "crazy… I'm going fucking crazy…"_

_She felt the need to run, the need to break something. _

_The bed seemed like a good start to the cure of her feelings. _

_Throwing her thin frame onto the sheets, she breathed in deeply of the laundry detergent. Tears threatened to spill. She muffled another scream in the sheets, gripping them tightly as she emptied her lungs. She clenched her eyes shut, making the tears spill out, dappling the sheets with salt water. Lifting from the sheets, she sniffled, and fingered the two wet spots gingerly. Her thoughts drifted to the most random things. _

_In her mind, there was a flash of gold. _

_Moon shine on a wet beach, ocean eyes- ocean waves lapping at the land, teasing; like a lover. Mocking; like an enemy. _

_The moon's blue breath surrounded the trees; green, the sand; brown, and the waters; black. That was all that could be seen. _

_She moaned and threw her self into the sheets again._

_Thinking of him again, remembering eyes, remembering touches, remembering words that were whispered. _

'_His eyes were closed, damn it.' she told her self, 'closed.'_

'_He was asleep, damn it. Knocked out.' she reminded her self again. _

_Another flash of gold. _

_There were no lights in her room. Darkness surrounded her, held her closely. Muffled cries came from her lips, from behind the cloth. _

"_I don't love him!" screaming as loudly as she could, she denied her heart. _

"_It's wrong! Vile!" she spat, throwing things, starting from pillows against the walls to mugs. "Fucking someone like him? What the hell?" she scoffed at her self, "Disgusting." She threw her last mug against the wall, relishing in the shatter. _

_Shatter. _

_One year. Just one year. And she felt like she was going to either kill her self, or everyone else _then_ her self. _

_His eyes, they not only saw her, they didn't only see through her, they wrapped around her, enveloping her in an unforgiving sea. She drowned in his eyes. _

_Eyes that she hadn't seen for one year. _

_It felt so unclean and pitiful, so wrong and dirty, that she scratched at her skin, trying to rid her self of the violated feeling. _

_Two species, two different century-born entities, do not a happy ending make. _

_Yet, she lay on her bed, jumper carelessly thrown somewhere else in her room, crumpled in a corner somewhere, in nothing but undergarments, thinking about those damn eyes. _

_Slim, delicate fingers. Fingers that caught the spinning coin and a blush that crossed a face. _

_Eyes. Lips. Shoulders. Chest. _

_Lower. _

_Memories. She hated them. _

_She couldn't understand them. _

_They've been tearing at her soul, at her mind, at her health for too long. _

_A year later, isn't supposed to be like this._

_A year later, she was supposed to forget. She wasn't supposed to always think back at any given moment and dwell on eyes. _

_Eyes. Lips. Shoulders. Chest. _

_Lower. _

_Lower. _

_No. No, no, no. _

_She moaned again, not only from pain, but from the feeling that stirred in her. _

_She denied it, screamed again and again that she hated him. _

_Slipping her fingers-fingers that aren't as delicate, that aren't as enticing- between her own legs, meeting the wetness there and the new tears welling up in her eyes, she moaned, she screamed that she hated him. _

_That he wasn't the reason for her being. _

_That she didn't need him. Didn't want him. _

_Sliding her fingers into her self, moving them. Faster, scream. _

"_I- ah! I don't!"_

_Faster, scream. _

"_Huh… ah… I… oh…AH!" _

_Faster, scream. _

"_I DON'T LOVE HIM."_

_Muscles clenching, arched back, head thrown to the side, Holly whispered, "Artemis." _

_She berated her self, hating how his name escaped her lips so lightly, in such a carefree manner. _

_Ocean eyes. _

_Trees, sand, ocean. _

_Blue. _

_Hazel. _

_Forever existing, forever will the ocean tempt the rest of the land. _

_Forever will his memory torment her._

Holly lay on the ground, the cement was uncomfortable, but she had no strength to lift her self up. Memories came back to her.

The initial napping, healing his mother.

B'wa Kell, healing his father.

The Lower Elements being blipped, bring Butler back from the dead.

Holly had done much for him, and let her young mind fall in love with him. Now she lay in the same cell that she had been in six years ago.

Six years.

Three sense she had last seen him. Was it three? Maybe. She didn't know. She didn't care.

Resentment boiled in her.

Anger sizzled and simmered.

Reaching a breaking point, Holly screamed out and threw her self up, making her feet support her weight. Animal like rage consuming her, she seethed and glared about the room.

The last time, she had an acorn.

But last time, it all ended well.

Holly made a resolution. She promised her self, that after those first years of knowing him, of always worrying that they would be exposed, and the year after. The year after where her soul was eaten by the thoughts of him. After all of that, and the two years of repeating a routine over and over again, being a stranger with Root again, taking her life for granted, not remembering something that important in a life, and the metal door, the brick wall that sealed off the most tender and raw part of her; an unhealed wound. After all of that, she promised that she would not let it be a happy ending like six years ago. She promised that what ever happened, it would end.

She would make sure of it.

She would end.

He would end.

**LEP Headquarters**

Foaly clipped into Root's office, eyes unblinking, fingers numb.

He closed the door after walking over the threshold. Eyes still unseeing and cast to the ground, he stepped in front of Root's desk and sat in a chair. His foil hat had been thrown off a while ago. It was cast somewhere in the office. Lips parted to speak, but his voice was cut off by Root's own demanding tones.

"Do you remember, Foaly," he paused to glance at the centaur, "do you remember how he escaped the time-stop?"

Foaly blinked at the commander and stammered, "Y-y-yes, he… changed the state of mind… sleeping pills," he blinked again at the commander, how was shaking his head. "Commander?" giving it a moment of hesitation, he corrected him self, "Julius?"

"He won last time, because we gave him faire warning," seeing the quizzical look on the genius' face, Root continued, "he knew when we were going to blue rinse the manor. And that was…" he looked expectantly at Foaly, waiting for him to finish the sentence.

"..after we got Holly..?" the centaur tried.

Root looked back at him with eyes that were so dull and dead that Foaly shivered, "Exactly."

"What… what are you trying to say, Ju-" an impatient hand went up when Foaly was about to speak so personally, "commander, then. What do you mean?" worry made it self ever present across Foaly's physiognomy. 'What is going through his head?' the brown eyed one asked himself.

A frown creased the old elf's brow, and his age showed more than it ever had. Foaly thought he saw a shadow of a tear trickle down a cheek.

"I'm old… too old… and Holly… she's older than I, when it comes to grievances. And when it comes to grievances, I already feel dead."

Silence ensued, the freezing sort of silence. The sort of silence that only exists before an explosion. An eruption. The sort of silence that is not comforting, the sort of silence that bad things can only follow.

"Prepare a team. We're going to time-stop Fowl Manor. Prepare a blue rinse. Don't ask questions. Don't even look at me. Remember," Root looked through Foaly "you can't speak to and see the dead. And I think my heart has stopped."

Ugh… don't look at me like that. This chapter wasn't as good as the last one. -shudders- I'm sorry. -weeps-

Now, reviewers. Must. Thank them.

Torina Archelda: Thank you very much. I'm sorry that this chapter isn't as up to par. But my mind is totally fried.

Dorinda: Good to hear that you liked it. And I hope that you won't be suffering from withdrawal.

jjeeff185: Thank you for giving me hope. I think. ;

Marfbag: You return! Greetings. And thank you for reviewing.

neutralgal: updated

FlyingPurplePig: Keep going… like the energizer bunny. "And going and going and going and going…" you see where this is going. Thank you for the review.

slime frog: Greetings. Wow. Your reviews are… highly amusing and inspiring. Hahahahaha. Hoped you somewhat enjoyed the chapter. (Every one read slime's story, The Seven Deadly Sins of Holly Short.) -whistles- I did nothing. O.o


	6. Chapter SixCold Reflections

**

* * *

Disclaimer: Un-mine.**

**Flash forward. **

**Juliet and her recollections of the past. It's getting near the end, I swear it is. O.o**

* * *

_You were once, my one companion, _

_You were all that mattered. _

_You were once my friend and father, _

_Then my world was shattered. _

Rain drops dived from the darkened sky; clouds hanging over head like a shroud covered the gleam of a star studded night.

Heel, toes, heel, toes

_Click… click…_

She strode in through the gate; the only sounds made were the soft clipping of her long strides and the harsh patter of water droplets dancing upon the stoned pathway under her feet.

Golden hair, turned dark with the rain, was haphazardly thrown back by a leather thong, save for a few rouge locks. Lim, pale fingers clutched two roses, each with a deep blue ribbon twined around the stem. The cold, hard face framed by the aged gold was slick with rain, cheeks dampened by the downpour like she never let them be by tears. Eyes, deep as the sky, as cold and hard as ice, bore straight ahead, never a sigh upwards or a glance below.

Her booted feet took her to a familiar place. It looked the same as the rest of the property, but to her, this one was different, special.

Unique in a way that made her blood boil, made coldness enter her veins, and blew a cold breath across her heart, hardening it to stone.

A rock like the marker before her feet.

_Domovoi Butler_

The name emblazoned on the tomb stone was like a curse to her eyes. The beginning of a frown tugged at the corners of her lips, but she pressed them together tightly into a thin line.

Flat line…

_beeeep…_

Water trickled from the clouds, showering her with small kisses. Cascading down her face, a colder imitation of sobs that never fell.

She lowered her lashes, and a sigh slipped through her relaxed lips, her breath billowing out in white curls.

_-"This is too weird for me, Dom. She just…" Juliet looked up at her brother, confusion cast across her physiognomy. _

"_I know," he murmured, pulling her close and speaking into her hair, "I know. She's too close to a memory."_

_Juliet wrapped her arms fondly around her brother, pressing an ear to his beating heat, hearing his labored breathing. She lifted her youthful face up to his more seasoned one. _

"_IF anything happens, it'll be me. Not you." She said sternly. _

_Butler smiled sister, "I know," he sighed, "I know."_

_Juliet quirked an eyebrow up at him, a smirk working its way into her features, "You seem to know _everything_ these days."_

"_That I do," he nodded in mock seriousness, "I am both old _and _wise."_

_The both shared a laugh and hold onto each other again until Artemis stalked in. Juliet backed away from Butler, and gazed at her mater, her principle.-_

She opened her eyes and felt the ghost of an embrace being washed away by rain and time.

The thing smile that memory had always brought to her slipped away, faded unlike scars- both broad and thing, internal and those upon her flesh.

She placed one of the roses at the base of the grave stone, lingering to let her numb fingers remain on the silk of the flower, tracing each petal gently. Slowly, she outlined the shape of fate, a picture of silver, and a self portrait of shadows, skimming up the stone to run her fingers across the letter engraved there.

_D… o… m…_

She closed her eyes again, a shiver running its way from her fingertip resting on the marble marker and coursed through the rest of her body.

_-Artemis had returned to his study after his interrogation with the prisoner._

_Prisoner…_

_Juliet turned the word over and over in her mind, pausing her current actions of chopping carrots to mentally prod at the word. She tried it on her tongue, softly. _

"_Prisoner…"_

_Butler glanced to his left at Juliet, vaguely wondering why she had paused. He noticed that a frown had tinged her face. Then she repeated the word. It tumbled from her lips to her brother's ears, _

"_Prisoner," Juliet looked up from the cutting board to her brother's eyes, "She's our prisoner."_

_Butler paused in his task of warming the cider. He took a wheezy breath and parted his lips as if he were to speak, _

"_Ju-"_

"_Butler?" Artemis' voice crackled over the intercom. _

_Butler pressed one of the blinking buttons on the intercom, "Yes?" he frowned. The system shouldn't be that unclear. He made a mental note to tinker around with it later on. _

"_Please have Juliet bring the Captain some dinner. She seems to have calmed down now."_

_He turned his gaze from the speaker to his sister, the words that were unsaid were shadows across his face. Juliet nodded at him, and he spoke, "Yes, Artemis."_

Beep

_Quiet settled over the kitchen as brother and sister shared a knowing glance. The cider simmered over low heat, the faucet dripped, two siblings emitted one last sigh together and the normal clatter of dish-preparing commenced._

_A salad and glass of mineral water were set on a tray at one end counter. Juliet wiped her hands on her brother's apron, and headed towards the cell, meal in hand. _

_Her blue eyes cast an unwavering gaze before her and her shoes were softly tapping on the tiled floor. _

_Heel, toes, heel, toes._

Click… click… _-_

The sound of her steps echoed through her memory, traveled through time, and bounced off the stone architecture of the old cemetery.

Still grasped gently between rain frozen hands was the other rose, the petals dripping as if it wept for her and for memories.

She leisurely strolled between the statues that littered the cemetery, turning her eyes from the road ahead to the side at random times, fixing her eyes on figurines of fallen angels. One in particular held her gaze. It's dilapidated form seemingly staring at her in turn, sending a thrill through her veins. She stopped before it, holding the stone gray eyes steadily.

"Hello," it seemed to whisper with undertones of fondness.

She lowered her lashes, letting tides of cold wash over the shores of her being.

* * *

Sorry for the delay. : But I can't figure out what goes after this. icckel sniffle 


	7. Chapter Seven An Ending

"Are we to call them fallen angels, then?" she asked her self, her blue eyes scanning the face of the stone angel. "Are we just to… mourn? And am I just to forget?" she turned to the little man that shimmered into view, perched on the shoulder of the concrete angel. "Are you going to make me forget?" question filled her eyes, and the rain still fell.

Julius Root sat there, his wings discarded carelessly at the angel's feet, the remnants of his hair dripping wet and his brow furred. He looked up into young eyes, his old orbs not seeming to see at all.

"Now," he asked slowly, "do you really need me to answer that?"

Sorrow washed her face as Julius watched, sorrow like when she passed her fingers over her brother's grave. Sorrow like when –

_bzzt_

_Juliet saw it, a memory like a photo shot, like a badly aimed camera._

_From eyes that where not her own, she saw her self thrown from Fowl Manor, her own brother's hands on her limbs as he dragged her out of the heavy front doors. She remembered looking up from the well kept lawn into her brother's eyes, eyes that spoke of an age that she would never understand. He shook his head at her, shutting the door quickly before she could pull her self up. She saw her hair, golden and disheveled flutter behind her as she flung herself at the door, pounding and screaming._

_In this mental video, her sight panned out, into the entourage of fairies gathered around the manor, each with sad faces and tears in their eyes. _

_bzzt_

Sorrow like when her brother tried to spare her life when she felt it should have been hers.

"Tell me," she said, unexpectedly, "tell me what happened. Everything. Because… I want to know before I forget." she clutched the rose in her hand tightly, a single thorn digging into her skin. Her eyes pleaded, begged, **yearned** for the rest of the truth. The **r e a s o n s .**

Julius ran his hand over his face, leaving his hand on his lips, his eyes up into the rain.

"Well," he began, "you already know the beginning…"

The screen faded out, the static starting in one corner, moving across so that the whole view was filled with nothing but the black and white dots.

A low hum emitted from the television, and the scene began unfolding before her closed eyes as Julius spoke in his grainy tones.

It flashed by, each panorama flickered unstably.

The mind wipes…

_bzzt_

_She had strapped on her helmet and flew out of the manor out into a moon lit night, where the trees were filled with wind. Tears trickled down from hazel eyes. Hazel eyes that drowned in oceans of _him

_Those eyes? That smile? The way he whispered good bye to her… it was too much. The first times that she felt an emotion overflow within her that she didn't want to end. _

_That was it; she didn't want to stop feeling this. This yearning, this _

_un-con-di-tion-al _

_love. _

_She berated her self in the helmet, setting the wings on auto; straight up. Her fingers grasped at the helmet straps, unbuckling and undoing. Each snap reminded her of her sanity slipping. She drew the helmet off, flinging her head back and letting the tears trickle down a different path. She sobbed a little bit louder and let the technology fall from her hands into the entourage of fairies below. Her empty hands clenched and unclenched, wanting something to hold on to. _

Artemis.

_Her mind reeled and she curled into her self, the wings still floating her higher and higher into the Dublin sky. Her tears fell and sparkled in the starlight. _

_bzzt _

Juliet's eyes didn't widen as the Commander told her of Holly's want for Artemis. She's be a fool if she didn't figure it out after all the month's events.

Julius kept on speaking, his eyes not moving and his voice not wavering.

Holly's despair one year later… and her own mind wipe…

_Bzzt_

"_Are you sure about this, Holls?" the horse asked urgently as he strapped on all the necessary materials. His eye brows merged together as his face was scrunched up in worry for the fairy sitting in the chair with nothing but a long tee shirt on. "Are you sure that you want this?"_

"_Yes…" she replied, her eyes already distant as if she were already thinking about… the things that she would forget. "I want this, Foaly. Because…" hazel orbs focused again and she looked up at her long time friend, "it… hurts too much… to… remember."_

_Broken sentences, broken heart, and now a broken memory. Foaly wasn't sure if he could hit the right buttons as his vision clouded over. _

_His back to her, he began the codes to purge her memory of the Fowl Incidents. _

"_Don't worry, Foaly," said a small voice from behind him. He didn't turn around, but peered slightly over his shoulder, "it'll be better, once I forget. It's too hard to live with _'what could have been'._"_

_bzzt_

"But it didn't get better. Or at least, not in the end." Julius seemed to get older with each word her spoke, and he still had a few more to go, "We had to do another mind wipe on her. Her mind … maybe it was her heart. But she kept on trying to remember that Mud Boy. She tried to kill her self one night. Her memories came back to her as her near depleted magic tried to heal her. Someone was to come each afternoon and check on her. Her condition had been deteriorating for a few weeks now. Upon seeing the blood on the floor, on her clothing, her hands… and the smile on her lips, we healed her. And wiped her memory clean again. It happened again, but not on such a frightening level. She merely showed signs of … _slipping_ again. We asked her the Operating Booth… and, rather unceremoniously, checked and deleted further memories. We didn't even let her remember the troll incident."

"When Artemis first… made contact?"

"Yes. And that was a very nice way of putting it, by the way."

"Then… then it all happened again, didn't it? Not just another relapse, but the whole damn thing… all over again."

Julius slowly turned to lock eyes with Juliet. When their eyes met, he nodded. Just as slowly.

A shadow passed over Juliet's face. She turned briskly heading towards Artemis' grave. He should have been her responsibility. She should have been the one to be evaporated in blue light.

Finally, she sobbed out her grief.

Upon reaching his tombstone, she fell to her knees.

_Try to forgive, teach me to live, _

_Give me the strength to cry…_

She wept on his tombstone, adding more water to the packed dirt below.

Juliet had fought the people to at least give her the benefit of having the two humans buried near to her.

_Spittle gathered at the corners of her mouth, her eyes were red and wet. Her face was distorted, deformed, twisted in pain._

_The pain of loss. _

_Some fairies scittered around her, averting their eyes from hers because it's just something that could **scar**. Enveloped in their somewhat fear of large Mud Men, they hurriedly gathered up their things. Wanting to leave at the first light. _

_Juliet had sought out Julius. The little man with the ugly cigar. She had demanded that they do something, everything that they could to make her wish come true. _

_The little man avoided her eyes, but gave in when Juliet fell to the ground in silence. For him, the silence was more frightening than her agonized screams. Silence already reminded him that Holly was never there again to bark back at him._

As she left the cemetery, the sky parted slightly and she threw a glance over her shoulder at the statue still with the fairy on its shoulder.

"You know where to find me. You know where I'll be." she said. Only when she turned to get a better _last look_ at the commander did she see that there was a concrete fairy resting where his form had been.

Juliet turned again, started heading out the front gates. As she left the grounds, a melody tinkled its way into her mind, and she muttered the lyrics under her breath.

_No more memories… no more silent tears, _

_Not more gazing across the wasted years…_

_Help me say good bye…_

_Help me say… good bye._

**Fowl Manor**

Juliet clambered up the stairs to her room. Dark, dismal, it befitted her mood after the graveyard encounter. After… many other things. She discarded the dripping blazer and skirt, kicked her shoes off into a corner, and slid the leather thong off her hair.

She sat in front of the vanity, running a comb through her wet, dark golden hair.

They would be there soon, with their whirring things and their cold, unknowing touches. They would be there soon, to take away her memories of something great. Of friends and of losses.

Maybe it would be better to forget, she thought to her self. Maybe I would be happier.

But another look into the mirror showed her that she would never again be happy. No matter what was forgotten or remembered.

Domovi was gone. And no amount of mind tweaking would fix that.

She put the silver handled comb down, and reached into a drawer for its replacement. She needed something else in her hands. Feeling in the dark of the compartment, her fingers found the silver and jade handle. She brought out her dagger, the shining blade catching the light.

Placing both hands on the knife, she raised it above her heart dramatically.

Hesitating a moment, she thought about how Holly had stormed out of the cell in a delirious rage, her jumper thrown over her shoulder. Domovi tried to stop her, but she brandished a knife at him, glaring him down.

_This is none of your concern, old friend. _

She remembered seeing the two together in Artemis' office; his eyes on hers. As if everything that needed to be said was there. She watched openly from the unclosed door as Holly dropped the dagger and slid her fingers up his arms, lacing her hands together behind his head. Juliet recalled feeling her jaw drop slightly as Artemis pulled the elf in closer, closer, closer…

Everything they both wanted.

And they were happy.

Juliet's blue eyes closed, and she remembered all of their names as she plunged the knife into her self and drew her last, gurgling breath.

It was the way that she wanted it; to go to them and remember who they are.

A shimmer out side of her window lingered, then flew off.

And then another frame scrolled into view.

**The End**

**Dedicated To**

**Commander Julius Root**

**? – 2004**

**A Good Commander and Friend.**

"Holy balls!" Holly exclaimed, her jaw hanging rather low, "I didn't think that they would be able to pull it off. I mean, I thought that it went on too long after the movie of the stupid this where you got us pinged," she hit the shoulder next to her at that remark, "but this was really good! What do you think?" she turned to a pale fifteen year old sitting beside her on the sofa.

"It was… interesting. To say the least." He raised a slim eye brow and popped another truffle into his mouth.

Fin-

* * *

A/N:… please don't hurt me. I know… this took too long… o.o I'm sorry. And the reason that the ending is such... is that I read the fourth book. SO. I didn't exactly PLAN for it to end like this… but… I still think that it's an amusing twist. I hope you enjoyed reading as much as I enjoyed writing.

And please celebrate with me; this is the first time I've ever finished a chapter story that I started.

Now. To thank reviewers that more likely hate me by now:

Black Aliss: confusion isn't really a bad thing. O.o thank you for reading. :

I should be Studying: well… here you go? I know, it's not silver platter worthy, but humor me! –hands over on silver platter-

Marfbag: stucky stuck stuck – it got unstuck. Sort of. O.o it took a while… so… we'll say … . super glue?

Confused: well, I'm sorry…? I hope it's sort of explained… ish.

Orlandie: thank you for reading, and I'm sorry that the chapter was confusing…

Slime Frog: … just... please don't hurt me. and eyes are eyes. let's just pretend it worked.

Firefye 12: yay for new readers!

Thank you all for reading and … not killing me.

me


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